Psycho bitching
should be a profession
Get a degree in psychobitchery Graduate and join a psychobitch agency Here you can

hire a psychobitch
For the days you are worn down tired and sad and in need of a helping hand Someone to flip the switch
To shout in your corner
Or to prep you up for you to hold your own
A remote coaching service for occasions calling for a healthy angry honesty For change
For revolution
For an abrupt end to being spoken over
Being touched
Being pushed
Being ripped off
Pissed off
Being ignored
Being patronised
Overcharged
Underpaid
Lied to
Deceived
Taken for granted
Not believed
Ridiculed
Pitted against
Slut shamed
Called out your name
Labelled hysterical and or
Crazy
Download the plug in to compose emails on your behalf
To direct a wanker to a voicemail
To send motivational quotes to your device such as

Psycho bitches bewitch snitches with firm hugs and three french kisses Psychobitches with big sticks dig ditches and build bridges Psychobitches flick little pricks into the distance
pitch a Mariah high note in an instance
Pscyho-bitches slit your thought needing sixty six stitches

Psychobitches enrich lives with horse manure If it smells like shit it probably is

Yeah it's legit
I hope my baby grows up to be a psycho bitch

Flips out at any hint of oppressive bullshit
whacks wildly with a quidditch broomstick
Cos high queen honey ie me and pops (her dad) took her to platform nine and three quarters to school her in a place where this shit didn’t exist oh wait
That world is fake and doesn’t exist so i wish, with fingers crossed, that my kid grows up and into a psychobitch and tells this patriarchal system where to stick it
flips it's derogatory lyrics and tells it
suck a clit after flashing your dick in public
Whilst people shake their heads as they do when a mumma takes out her breastfeeding tit

So here’s where I’ll acknowledge that some people may flinch at the word tit sorry
You see I’m no psychobitch
I’m The ​I’m gonna call it but still hope you all like me​ kind

The ​yeah I agree ​kind
The follower the retweet
The ​say an opinion in my room, in my mind​ kind
the​ arghhhhh ffs dont worry its fine​ kind
Good at forgetting resentments and grudges and what I should say when face to face with the problem
The​ anger management cry instead of explode​ kind
Been thoroughly conditioned to be sensitive of how others feel (which is a good thing)
Of keeping everything nice (which is nice)
To bite my lips (which hurts sometimes)
I know the rules
I know that it's nots ok for me to shout at you from the stage cos this is a safe space where what is performed has been edited and censored to ensure that it's accessible and appropriate for my audience, you and what I say must be digestible, considered, pointed but not too sharp so that its inclusive, non offensive to you
and all those that can’t stand this wouldn’t be here in this
liberal room
so this is for you
liberal few
far and between
The world isn’t passive
It's much more mean

And sometimes we are on separate planes of politics
But that’s cos we live in a fucked up crazy world which deports windrush generations Campaigns against immigration to return to the good old days before immigration!
Racists calling out anti-semetics demanding closed borders to the effects of present day war and famine and open market to arms deals to nations with shady reputations and crusades of gm crops and patented seeds
it's all comic relief from colonial privilege
All export of image and hypocrites
But don’t you worry cos we’ll probably be just about dead from our carcinogenic crisis before the earth’s poles switch
So as I was saying I wish my kid grows up to be a psychobitch
Cos any other jobs is just rubbish
Waste of time
Bashing brains on glass ceilings feeling like this can’t be right
I must be too weak to fight
But if i play my part as such then i just might
Get a promotion, save for a pension not be made redundant on maternity leave
Have some kids and save them from a life of poverty
Proving that waiting silent for your time is time worth spent but it aint
it's like watching the wall become the paint
It's like avoiding the speech by pretending to faint
It's buying your likes to become an insta saint
It's a spiritual corset, a soul’s constraint
Pretend that you don’t need to do a poo
Carry all the stodge
Take it home with you
Say yes to all jobs
Call your male mates to ask for their rates
Double your quotes
Squeeze eyes tight closed to send them
Triple a workload pressure galore
But a psychobitch says gimme that
1 k 2 k 10 k please
No that’s a commission an amendment is a commission
No that’s overtime emails sent on sunday needing monday reply is overtime
Cos Psycho bitch ain’t too shy to ask for what she wants
Psychobitch aint scared to demand what she needs
Psychobitch will scratch any itch
Psychobitch sees it, seizes it
Flips it ain’t afraid to kiss it goodbye if it won’t comply
Psychobitch is there inside, you
For some she takes alcohol to come alive
For others its balls

And others its others
A fake email address or a toilet power stance
A deep breath or a fierce little black dress
Some need shampoo and blow dry
Some need a mirror and a cry
Some she just appears
And some have to decide
Psychobitch is the witch on the stake, the 2 centimetre icing on the cake
The fake nails, hair, lips
The jezzy best mate
Psychobitch is here for the ride
Life’s a slide and her arse is loving it
Psychobitch wears watches with dead batteries cos times a cage and life’s a stage and life a page and lifes made of actions without hesitations
And doubt is for morons who write on tissue paper with crayons and fear is for bigoted extremists
And this
Well this began as a psychobitch pitch for big business
to show my kid how to be more than she is told she is
How to be brave and not give a shit
If she believes in a world that is rich with magic
And dreams of a space where she can transmit - Without doubt she’s too cute or too sweet - exactly what she means and mean it
But now i’m realising that I am more psychobitch than I believed at the start
And if you move in this world all cock and no heart
And are waiting for a psychobitch comedy porn poem to get your kicks
We’ve come to that part just in time for the finish
Come lean close and listen to this
call me your psychobitch
I’m so good at pretending I’m an irrigation ditch
Yeah that’s right I’m a psycho bitch and I’m not taking anything for it
Cos I don’t want to
Cos why not, there’s literally nothing else to do
anything else is not being true
Fuck you fuck you fuck you